How I Thought it Would Be

I am six months behind on the blog and reading plan. I have attempted to come back to it once already. But, to be honest, this is kind of exactly how I thought the blog would go.

No, it’s my life that is not how I thought it would be. Let’s be honest, though, how many people look out at their life when they’re twenty and build expectations that are fully met?

I thought I would be a member of the church I grew up it. I thought I would have been on the mission field for at least ten years by now. I thought I would have four children. I thought I knew my place.

There have been bends in the road I never could have predicted. There have been detours that never should have been set for us. But I’ll say it again: God wasn’t surprised.

God does not want me to have chronic health conditions, but he can use them to give me compassion, to make me a comfort.

God did not want me to lose a child, but he can use my grief to speak to others.

God did not want us to be rejected over and over, but he can always open yet another door.

We’ve been in a season of waiting, of healing, of learning, and of redirecting. I still don’t know exactly what the future holds, but I believe I have a new direction. The details will come.

My life is a mosaic built from the pieces of my broken dreams, my broken understanding, and sometimes even my broken will. I can’t imagine what the finished picture will be, but I’m eager to find out, for I’ve placed the pieces in the master’s hands.